This uneasy feeling..

This thing... trapped within me,
it wants to show,
I keep it hidden inside,
whether it is futile,
I don't want to know.

Wish it was gone,
wish it did not exist,
I tell myself to continue on, 
even though it persists...

Comforting lies are but for a moment,
what i have within me, is nothing but forever,
it grew inside me unknowingly, unnoticed,
without a peep, none whatsoever.

When it out grew me,
I knew it had to be,
it cannot be stopped,
it cannot be controlled,
how can it be now, and not later?

No longer under a shadow,
has it to have grown,
something out of nothing,
a mind of its own,
it shall last so long i shall live,
through infinite time,
it will not disappear.

Don't know if this takes over,
would it be better,
or worsen the matter,
I will take the risk,
but not now, not here.

Maybe tomorrow,
maybe the day after,
I want to know when,
should it end in laughter,
or with endless sorrows.

I will halt with but a warning,
once it is born within,
be strong and fight to win,
should some who keep this abomination,
beware the consequences,
or suffer for what thou had done,
for the consequences are second to none.