LUCK? A joke is more like it....

I have accepted myself as a failure,
because she pushes me aside like trash,
never let to feel the joy of life in any way,
she looks at me like an experiment that went horribly wrong,
i was useless,
not appreciated,
looked down upon,
obsolete...

Something i must've did,
in my past life,
for her to resent me so,
how i feel broken hearted,
wanting to fix what sin i have made,
but never given a chance...

How i'd love that she would come back to me,
by my side,
but she will never return until i've repaired what i had done,
although i have no idea,
it must have been something in the past,
in my last life.

A terrible sin it must have been,
for her to leave me alone in the world,
so torturing a day,
each day without her,
i suffer that of what failures get,
painless yet heart stabbing,
what that cannot be sensed,
but can be felt falling out of every shameful loss,
right down from the very pits of darkness...

In my heart,
she is gone,
but is in everyone else,
not knowing how long it will last,
but treasure her,
never do anything to make her leave you,
never abuse her,
mistreat her,
of else you'll regret as how i did...